The following is based only on the CBS website and other Survivor rumors that may have started. This morning while I was listening to the radio the DJs interviewed Jeff Probst so of course I feel the need to start the fun of Survivor I am pumped and ready to share my feelings on the playas (as the Leigh would say). I am rating the following Playas on a 1-10 scale. 1 being someone that I cant wait until they vote off and 10 being my wager as to who will do well. Note: I didnt say who will win I really cant get that vibe until the merge but if webmaster Davey D says I have to pick then I shall.

Playa #1:Christy Smith aka DG (for deaf girl): She was born around the same time as me although will she be able to hear the tigers jumping through the amazon after her (do they have tigers in the amazon??) Ill give her a 6 I say she gets the sympathy votes until people get ticked off at her.

Playa #2: Deena Bennett: her luxury item are water balloons are you serious?? If you want to play with water balloons just use the girl with the implants that they have on EVERY survivor are you serious? And she doesnt drink alcohol thats a no-no in my book I give her a 1!

Playa #3: Heidi Strobel: Ok Dave can we get a picture of this freakshow on the website here All I have to say is that she is a crazy looking elf an albino elf if you will - $20 she and the swimsuit model use nudity to win some of the immunity challenges (JP did say on the interview that nudity is a factor in some of the challenges YIKES) and elf is a PE teacher yeah I bet you are a big believer in Dodge Ball Eh?? 1! (side note: that would actually be a good immunity challenge I dont think I was born to be a banker)

Playa #4: Janet Koth: Yep someone got the glamour shots done for the survivor picture hear oh dear she is an abstinence counselor I hope they vote her off so there is some serious doggy style once they MERGE yeah read into that one (you guys know how I play scattergories nice and dirty!) and her favorite alcoholic drink is expensive merlot yo Janet if it aint from a box it aint no good I think she might have some pep though Ill be generous and give her a 3.

Playa #5: Jeanne Hebert: OK she is from MA so I have to root for the New England vote and her luxury item is massage oil now lets assume she didnt know that it was a male vs. female tribe I say you go Jeanne (were going to need a good nickname) I have a good vibe from her I give her a 10.

Playa #6: Jenna Morasca: and here is the one we have been waiting for its the swimsuit model well this broad better be smart and use her body the way God intended to to overrule all men and make them suffer ok maybe I watched a little too much lifetime today but regardless I am actually hopeful unless she is stupid so I will give her two ratings 7 if she is smarter than a doorknob and well a 1 if she isnt.

Playa #7: (bored yet?) JoAnna Ward: Ah yes Joanna Ward our friend from mother Africa I actually have faith in her and she has faith in God and the Lord Jesus Christ will see us through all of this terrible pain and keeping with the commandments our Lord has placed with us we shall rise umm yeah she is one of those actually a born again Christian an actual quote from her bio: One of my most enjoyable hobbies is lifting up the name of the Lord Jesus Christ in pure praise and worship umm ok but God knows more than I do and I dont have an easy pass to heaven so just to be safe I will give her a 7. There is always the Vecepia factor who knew?? (ok except you Dave)

Playa #8: Shawna Mitchell: Sketch she is a pube head mama said, "never trust a pube head" I give her a 2.

Playa #1: Alex Bell: Alex, Alex, Alex your favorite drink is pepsi, your favorite scent is Jasmine and you dont drink. 1.

Playa #2: Butch Lockley: Well I cant make fun of his name because I have a cousin named Butch yes the son of my Uncle Tito (not TE To but TIT-O) oh yes so normally I would be on Butchs side but tinted glasses Im not down with that 4.

Playa #3: Daniel Lue: Asian Americans represent! Actually that is his words not mine when he was cast in MTVs tough enough so he has already been on a reality tv show that is just wrong oh well he seems ok Ill give him a 4.

Playa #4: Dave Johnson: I think Dave is my soul mate Dave Johnson that is not the webmaster Davey D Dave here likes the same video games as me, same alcohol (keystone!), he likes the color green and we are both rocket scientists umm ok he has me on that one but I hope people say that it doesnt take a rocket scientist to win survivor that would be a great Jeff Probst line I cant wait until he yells at them I give Dave an 8.

Playa #5: Matthew Von Ertfelda: I am going to have a field day with this guy he is the lamest prettyboy ever first of all VON ERTFELDA? Oh high school must have been rough and he is in hotel management ok I dont know much about the industry but if he is taking money at the motel 6 I dont think thats rocket science unlike soulmate Dave who actually is a rocket scientist his luxury item: his high school wrestling jacket oh rough and tough with the big boys and a quick cut and paste from his bio: In the summer of 1998, he organized a deep jungle trek into unmapped areas of New Guinea to track cannibals. Who is this guy?? Just because he is the epitome of weird I was thinking of giving him a 9 but I dont think I am going to like him so Ill even it out by giving him a 1. (I do highly suggest you reading his bio its outrageous)

Playa #6: (be patient Im almost finished) Rob Cesternino: I guess this guy is supposed to be funny apparently his hero is Bob Barker now I cant argue with that because I am a fan of the silver fox myself I have a feeling though this guy is going to be a fool and no one will take him seriously I give him a 2.

Playa #7: Roger Sexton: man that last night either worked for him or against him in high school but Roger werent you already on this show with Elisabeth?? But ok I am actually pro this guy I think he has what it takes he gets an 8.

Playa #8: (Finally!) Ryan Aiken: this guy used to be on a TV show what a copout I like it when its people who just want money none of this fame crap he is a moron! 1!

Avg. Score for dem Bitches: 3.88

Avg. Score from dem Bitches bitches: 3.63

My guess its going to be a close one but not that survivor has a pattern but it has gone boy/girl/boy/girl so its time for a woman to win and isnt that all that matters?? So thank you for bearing with my analysis it was a day worth wasting I am just interested to see whats going to happen Until then peace out. JEFF PROBST FOREVER!

And DONT FORGET! to visit my favorite Survivor website at Davey D's reality roundup.